Friday, August 24, 2007

I was at my new favorite hang recently "Everything Goes Book Cafe" and they have this question posted on the wall in huge letters and I found myself starring at it. The fear of failure has been my nemesis my whole life. So I've been spending the last few days walking around Staten Island and Manhattan trying to answer this very question and what I've found is that the answer is so confusing I don't know where to start. I thought I'd toss the question out there to see what thoughts it provoked in others and what your answers would be....

11 comments:

Matt & Rachel said...

Okay here's my first comment of many I'm sure and some of you may have this struggle as well. I don't how to figure out what one of my million ideas a day is the one thing I would do if I knew I couldn't fail? I do I make that decision? Do I have to pick one? Sigh....it just makes me say "what the crap!" :oO

Richard and Melody Gary said...

I think it would be the worst thing ever if I couldn't fail. If you never fail there is nothing new to learn, there would be no perseverance, I would begin to take advantage of situations and not be truly thankful for everything I would get. I would never have the humbleness needed to make a great person great. They know what it is like to be down on their luck and they have compassion on others going through that same situation.
Also, I would lose the touch and walk with God, because why would I need His help anymore if I can do it myself. He knows our most perfect plan and that plan involves falling and picking ourselves up WITH His help and trying again. It also involves listening to His Spirit because when the situation comes that He wants us to take, He will tell us and then guide us to the fullest until it comes to fruition. God wants us to be absolutely and totally dependant upon Him. When we are, there is not the great fear to fail because you know if He said to do it, then He will provide the way through it.
Also, I have to stand on the Word that says He does not give us a Spirit of fear but power, love and a sound mind. The fear that starts to grip me has to be placed with the Word of God so that the fear does not control me, but God is in control.
We are just humble servants of Him who sends us, and nothing should be in control but Him. Is it ok to get scared a little? Yes, but then take it into Him. The word also says that we are not to be afraid of sudden fear. That means that we will for a short moment be afraid, but when we renew our mind, thoughts and feelings with God's word, it will not go void and we will be strong in Him.
Be strong my sister and rely on His word to get you through.
Love you babe,
Mel

Renee & Sheldon said...

Well, the first thing that comes to mind for me is that I would quit my office job and open my own bakery/pastry shop. Not only would it be great to be my own boss, but it would be great to be around that kind of food all day and share it with others =)

Matt & Rachel said...

I don't feel for a second that my fear in failure has anything to do with my trust or faith in God. I guess to me it's just so much simpler than that. There are lots of dreams I have and have had for years but have never tried to make them come true because I have failed at many things before and I don't want to fail at any of them. So instead I just don't do them which I think is wrong. So I saw this question and thought how great it would be if for once I could get out of my own way and try something. I think it would be an interesting idea if we each got a free pass to do that one thing we always wanted to do and know for a fact we wouldn't fail at it, how great would that be. Why do we have to God things to death?

Matt & Rachel said...

I think that sounds awesome Renee. You'd have the best cakes in world! R

Tammy A. said...

Well, Like Rachel I have thought about this question for a while now. And the hard part is finding what I would do since so much of my life has been wrought with fear of failure. It would open a whole new world for me that I have never seen with my faulty eyes. I have so many ideas for my life; so many ventures I want to tackle, but so afraid that I wouldn't be good at it (i.e. writing a book, writing a screenplay, owning a book store, trying out for plays etc...) A movie quote I heard once said that "So many things I see remind me of something I read in a book but shouldn't that be the other way around??"
Okay, so here's the challenge..by the end of the year, do something that scares the 'what the crap!' out of you(me)even though your whole mind, body, and soul is telling you that failure is inevitable.

And Rachel...you have Dealey! What a success you made!!!!!

Tammy A. said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Dave and Gloria said...

Hmm.. Good question. I would sing and dance. I've always felt self-conscious about my voice. And if you've seen me bust a move you would know why I have a fear of failure. I never got trained, and now I wish I had.

patti said...

OK...I"m with you Rach...I am struggling to narrow it down to just one thing. I have lots of fun dreams and it's not this big sense of failure why I don't it's just...well, dare I say where I am and life in general. I have no regrets just wonders of if I's...hope that makes some sense.

Ok from my list of things such as open a gift shop/craft shop/coffee/brunch shop, write a kids book, dance on stage, be a basketball coach, go into interior design...I think the one I would take this free pass would be to be a principal. I'd love to open a school and have the opportunity to guide children and a staff of teachers to impact the future.

Again...I have been considering this for a while but now just isn't the right time because I have bigger things so maybe when G goes to school and I have time I"ll go back to school or maybe just skip the education thing altogether and get into that interior design stuff..who knows I might end up doing both!

Matt & Rachel said...

Hey guys, my friend Christine emailed me her & her husbands answer to the question and I had to share it with everyone.....

"My first response was to consider things I would like to do, but seem too chicken to get them started or they seem too big to get a handle on and too risky: go back to school for my MFA, start a business were my first thoughts. Like I said, Stephen on the other hand thought very differently. His response: stop world hunger.

Stephens answer made me stop in my tracks, not once did I consider anyone but myself when I was thinking through this, well that's not entirely true I know I want a business that helps other artist (yes I think I've got it figured out) but to end world hunger...wow, why didn't I think of that? What about finding homes and providing and amazing life for all those beautiful children who have no parents and little hope in Africa? (and many other countries) Anyways, like I said it was a response I had to share.....I don't think there's anything wrong with wanting our dreams to come true don't think that I just thought it was interesting that the one guy to respond viewed the question completely different from all us women and had a quite profound answer.

The Craftypigs said...

I wish I would've followed my instincts for science in school. I should've been a doctor. I had the tenacity for school and study. I had the desire to learn and interest. If I thought I would be able to still raise a child, be a wife, and have some kind of life I would go back to school and become a doctor. Probably a peditrcian. I would also write a book. I would have more children. I would be an actor and get paid for it. I would've gone abroad to school. I would learn to speak/read/write in five different languages. I would live in Africa. I would learn to fence. And I don't think it's fear of failure that keeps us from things we want it's fear of beginning.